I have the flu and am condemned to daytime television. Well,well,well. What shall we watch? The show about the woman who owns 700 cats? Hmmm. Tempting. No, let’s watch a show about crop circles. My experience with gardening is fairly comprehensive, so in my infected state, my mind wanders. If I wanted to vandalized a property, I would want to do it in such a way, that no one could tie it to me. I would want that crop circle to show up when I was a million miles away. I would find old stale hay that was moldy with mildew and fungus and hose it down, catching the infected water in a basin. With my fungus laden water in a pump agricultural sprayer, I would go out and spray my pattern in a healthy field on a windless night. The infected grain would succumb to the fungal infection days later, falling over naturally. This is called damping off. I suppose I would have to add Ironite to the fungus water solution to add the microscopic iron globules. It would take about 10 minutes to spray the pattern. At least this is my fever inspired plan. Needs more aspirin.
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